No joke, that really happened!

I was reading Writing without period's blog and she had a post entitled ‘no sh*t that really happened!’ Well I have a few of those stories too, so here goes:

A long time ago in a tiny town in Mexico, my father decided he was deeply in love with my mother, could no longer live without her and wanted to marry. The custom back then (and still today) is the boyfriend must ask his girlfriends parents (really the father, because the woman has no say in anything over there, especially back then) for her hand in marriage. He would go with his parents or perhaps god parents if the parents are deceased or for some reason cannot go with him.

In this case my grandfather (my dad’s father) had passed away many years ago and for some reason my grandmother would not or could not go with him to ask for my mom’s hand. He must not have had any godparents in town either because he asked the village priest if he would go representing his parents. The priest agreed and off they went.

Well my maternal grandfather was a very gruff and serious man and he did not believe in his daughter’s going to school or marrying just anybody – and in this case I guess – most especially not marrying someone who did not have a house to offer his daughter, he wasn’t rich or anything. But my dad loved my mom sincerely and that is what he offered. Well it ticked my grandpa off, cause when my dad and the priest came knocking on his door – priest or no priest - Grandpa pulled out his shotgun and ran them both off! I guess he wasn’t worried about his soul going to hell for running off the priest. Many years later, grandpa pulled his shotgun out again when he ran to fetch his two youngest children who ran away from home for the big city – Mexico City, D.F. But that is another story.

Well that did not deter my mom and dad and since they couldn’t do things according to protocol, they eventually eloped and got married on a dark and stormy night [that’s another story too! I tell you we have a bunch of them in my family. I should probably write a book….]. Grandpa accepted the marriage after that and we visited many times. My parents remained married for almost 25 years until my dad’s untimely death in his early 40s. He was a great husband and wonderful father.

So what’s your ‘no joke that really happened’ story?

What Empty Nest?

Most people’s children leave the nest when they turn 18. Some leave for college or travel the world and others just to be in their own place. I constantly read or hear about so many mothers upset about empty nest syndrome – feeling their lives now have no meaning and they have nothing to do since their children are gone. I envy those women with empty nests! My youngest will be graduating from high school this year and just like her older brother and sister – she will not be leaving to go off on her own. The same as it was for me and my two sisters – however unlike my mother who did not want us to leave and did everything to prevent it – I DO want my children to go out and spread their wings. Alas the economy among other things has kept them at home while they work and go to school. Grandma (my mom) is no help either constantly telling them they don’t need to go off into a dangerous world and should stay home until they marry, etc. as is the tradition in our culture. And while most moms would probably be thrilled to still have her “babies” at home – I am not. Having married young (19) to get out of the house and had children young (21) at the insistence of my husband, I was looking forward to some ME time and trying to improve the relationship with my husband and having some fun. Don’t get me wrong I LOVE my children but what once was a perfect house for a mom, dad and three small children is definitely not the case now that we are five adults. And to make it even worse we only have 1 ½ baths with the main bath only accessible from our bedroom! With everyone working odd hours and needing to take showers also at odd hours – needless to say it ruins the mood. And again the economy doesn't help making buying a bigger house out of the question right now. I long for the day when I can stay in my PJs all day Saturday….watch an R rated movie without feeling uncomfortable if the kids walk in during a sex scene….be spontaneous in the bedroom, living or kitchen for that matter….a whole day of uninterrupted work on any one of my many hobbies…be able to take off on a moment’s notice for a three-day fun-in-the-sun weekend. There is so much to do and see out in the world that I not only long for the day I have an empty nest but for the day I can retire from work to devote more time to experience everything. A great article in the New York Times sums it up best - http://www.nytimes.com/2009/01/20/health/20well.html?em.